I’M OFFICIALLY 24!
Maybe if I scream it my body will hear me and stop looking like it’s 14…
In all seriousness, this year, I have really embraced getting older. I get to look back on the years and see all the things I’ve accomplished, experienced, grown in, etc. And honestly, there are a million and one things I’ve learned in 24 years, but you’d be here forever…so here’s 24!
1. God DOES Give You More Than You Can Handle!
I don’t know if I thought this because I lived in the south (or maybe it’s an older generational saying), but growing up I always heard this and I truly believed it! Anytime I would go through something difficult, even in the midst of uncontrollable tears, I just thought…God must know I can handle this. As I got older, and more so into my 20s, life just continued to get harder. I kept thinking why! Why is He doing this to me… I can’t handle this! And suddenly, as I read scripture, I realized…if He gave me what I could handle, I wouldn’t need him, nor is He GIVING me these terrible circumstances. I realized that because we live in a fallen world, bad things happen. However, the awesome thing is that God uses those things for our good. And in those hard situations when we feel like it’s more than we can handle, we get the opportunity to cling to Him trusting that He will get us through it.
2. Vegetables Are Actually Good!
Did anyone else hate vegetables growing up or is that just me?? My mom didn’t know how to cook much when I was younger and so she never made us eat vegetables. How am I still alive you ask… I have no idea.
Not until college did I start eating salad. Also, I just had cooked asparagus for the first time the other day and it was delicious! So I am realizing little by little veggies are actually good. My eyes are opened…so you can totally call me healthy Brittani from now on!
3. Give Yourself Grace
This has to be one of the most important things I have learned (obviously Brittani that’s why it’s on my list). If you’re like me…a human being on this earth… you shame yourself for literally everything! However, recently I have been practicing giving myself grace, because whatever the circumstance… IT’S OKAY! Each day is a learning opportunity and a chance to grow into the person God has created you to be.
4. Motivating Yourself is an Underrated Skill
If you have ever motivated yourself to go to the gym or to finish an 8+ page paper (before the day it is due) you know what I’m talking about! Motivating yourself is so difficult because you have to go against what your own brain is telling you! So if you can honestly tell me you are good at motivating yourself, you’re winning at life and please teach me your ways.
5. It’s OKAY to Cry
I have to remind myself of this one constantly. Growing up I always thought that if I cried, it meant I was weak. Even to this day, I apologize if I start to cry. WHY?! Why do I do that….I mean I know why, but it is such a lie to believe that crying is a weakness. It takes A LOT of strength to cry! So advice to you and my 24-year-old self… let those tears out, because it creates so much healing and you are now way stronger because of it.
6. Be Present
As technology and social media become more enticing this one seems to get harder and harder. I am definitely someone who loves to take pictures and videos of everything! It also becomes so much harder when you are a youtuber and you feel like you need to show people every second of your life! However, I am so blessed that my husband is the exact opposite. He unknowingly has shown me how to be present in every moment of life. From sitting on the couch together to soaking up the beauty on a hike, he has helped me to know that I don’t have to be scrolling through social media or feel the need to show the world. I can just be present and rest in every moment.
7. Breathe
I feel like being present and breathing seem so obvious, but ironically the hardest. I can’t tell you how many times I have gotten so overwhelmed to the point of crying or woken up already anxious. And the crazy part is when we feel overwhelmed or anxious our immediate brain response is to go faster in hopes that we won’t be overwhelmed anymore, yet we just continue in the cycle. So in this fast-paced world, I am learning to sit and breathe. Simple yet so impactful.
8. Fear is a DIRTY LIAR
YES IT IS!! As I looked back at my 24 years of life I realized fear played such a huge role in everything I did. It saddens me to look back and see that reality in my life. However, within the past few years, I have been praying more and more for boldness. I have learned that being fearful isn’t “just who I am”, but a lie that the enemy continues to use in my life. I was created to be so many things; bold, joyful, peaceful, etc. and I won’t let fear win!
9. Letting Go of Control
I don’t know about you, but this past year I have realized that I like to have control (especially in marriage). I personally believe control plays such a huge part in my worry and anxiety because instead of trusting God in the midst of everything…I choose to control situations that I can’t control. When you write that out or say it out loud it kind of sounds dumb right? Like why would we try and control things we can’t control?? But we do it all the time! So I am slowly learning to LET GO OF CONTROL…and give it to God.
10. Forgiveness is For Yourself
Forgiving someone is easier said than done…especially if what they did really hurt. However, forgiving isn’t for them…it’s for you. God keeps teaching me this truth…because I still struggle with this. I am someone who holds on to my anger when someone has deeply hurt me. Although the more God has reminded me of this truth, the more freedom I have experienced.
11. My Identity
This year I have learned so much about my identity and who God says I am. I heard a cool analogy that I want to share about Identity with you guys.
If you look at a box and say it is a sphere, the box still remains a box because it doesn’t change based on what you said. The creator of the box made it into a box, gave it a purpose and so it is what it is. Nothing can change that. Just like that, our creator created us for a purpose, perfectly and wonderfully made. Someone can tell us differently, but that doesn’t make those things true just because they said it. They are not the ones who created us.
I love this analogy because I often times attach my identity to what others think or believe about me, or even things I think about myself! However, the truth is God is the only one who can tell us our identity because we were created by Him. And gladly enough we were made in His image, making us perfect, holy and righteous.
12. Be Vulnerable
UGHH… I hate being vulnerable. haha. Maybe it’s just me, but it’s scary to be vulnerable! In 24 years I have learned that it is the most healing and freeing thing you can do. We were created to do life with others, not to be alone. And in doing life with others, vulnerability is necessary for true friendship, accountability, and freedom. I still hate it…haha, but I have learned to embrace it.
13. Marriage Teaches You About Yourself
Did anyone expect this about marriage?? Because I certainly did not! Being married showed me that I am NOT perfect (skkkert… should have known that already Brittani). But for real, I realized I am selfish, stubborn, bad at communicating… the list could go on. However, these past three years have taught me so much about myself and I am so excited to continue to learn and grow with my wonderful husband.
14. Love is a Choice
If you are married can I get an AMEN?! I think we really don’t comprehend how easy it is to choose NOT to love, because the reality is we live in a broken world where people hurt us and we hurt them. Something my mom tells her husband that has really changed my perspective on choosing love is, “I don’t like “action”, but I choose love. And regardless of my emotions and how I feel right now I choose love because I choose us and I love you.” GAME CHANGER, AMIRITE? What a wise woman.
15. My Love Language
Last year I learned my love language and it gave me a new and better understanding of myself! I also know my husbands love language and cha ching… he loves me even more now.
If you don’t know your love language I will link it here for you!
16. I CAN COOK NOW
I believe I mentioned earlier that growing up my mom didn’t really know how to cook. Which then meant growing up I didn’t learn how to cook. A short story about how bad I was… I tried making cookies one time and I put a cup of baking soda instead of a tablespoon because I misread directions and I didn’t know the difference because I had never made anything that needed baking soda…sad right…haha. However, God has now blessed me with a man who loves to cook and he is teaching me! I don’t want to brag, but hey, I think I am getting pretty good at it now!
17. There is Joy in Loneliness
If you follow me on youtube or any social media, you have heard me say this before, there is joy in loneliness, and I 100% believe it!
To be honest, loneliness sucks… as a military wife I know that for sure. However, I also know that the greatest moments to hear God speak is in your loneliness, when it can just be you and him. And during those moments He somehow gives you this overwhelming peace and joy. A great verse to reference is 1 Peter 1:8, “Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy…”
18. Have a Giving Heart
This one my mom taught me. She has the most giving heart and it’s the most beautiful thing. She gives without expecting anything in return, and that is such a reflection of Jesus that she continues to teach me.
19. Choosing Joy in Every Situation
This one, God has really been teaching me lately. For a long time, I always put on a happy face. I didn’t like crying and I didn’t like being vulnerable, so instead, I hid the fact that I was hurting on the inside and acted happy. Keyword acted. I soon realized that happiness was only temporary and that I still had pain on the inside that I continued to suppress. What God has taught me is that choosing joy doesn’t mean not crying. It doesn’t mean stuffing pain. It means bringing those hurts to Him and watching him exchange that pain for joy. It means that life isn’t easy, but I can rest knowing my Father has gone before me to make a way because that is what He promises. (John 16:33) And it means opening my eyes to the blessings around me and seeing how God is at work in each circumstance.
20. Write Out Your Thoughts
Journaling and writing out your thoughts is so freeing! If you are like me, your mind is always going. So sitting down and writing out my thoughts, things I need to remember, etc. is so essential in my mental health.
21. Feeling Purposeless is Normal
I go in and out of this feeling often…I think we all do. As a military wife, this can be hard because military life isn’t really about you. You move because your husband HAS to and you just have to go along with the ride. You start to feel like ‘what’s my purpose here?’, ‘should I even get a job if we are going to move again?’
However, I have learned that I have to keep remembering and going back to my identity. I have to remember that God created me for a purpose whether I know what it is or not. My favorite verse (Jeremiah 29:11) says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” I cling on to this promise often. I’m here to tell you (and remind myself) that feeling purposeless is normal…. we have not been forgotten by our Heavenly Father, and he has a plan and purpose for you and me.
22. Drink Water!
Why is this a new or shocking concept to me at all, I have no idea. However, you may not believe this but water is actually the only thing I drink. Sometimes I may have juice or tea… but 99.9% of the time I drink water. Growing up I NEVER drank water… I thought it was gross…because in my hometown it WAS gross (no I wasn’t just a weird child). However, for the past year, it’s basically all I drink… and I love it! I have so much energy, my skin is clearer, I never get sick or have headaches…the list could go on. And water is essential to life so…obviously it is important!
23. Listen to the Older Generations
Yes, I know sometimes older generations can be stubborn and annoying when it comes to politics, being politically correct, and telling you how to live your life (like yes grandma I know I’m supposed to wash my hair more often…okay) but they are also incredibly wise! I don’t know if this is an eldest grandchild thing or what, but I love and respect my elders and as I have gotten older I have realized they are so wise! Okay…they were probably always wise, I was just a bratty teenager who didn’t want to listen.
24. I AM ENOUGH
The word ‘Enough’ is a word God gave me for 2018. Most of my life I have struggled with not feeling enough in areas such as friendship, family, jobs, marriage, etc. and that was such a lie from the enemy. This year God has been reminding me of who HE says I am, and that I no longer need to feel less than. His promise to transform my heart has helped me to fully believe I AM ENOUGH.
